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The Bad, The Very Bad and The Ugly: Resumes that shouldn't have seen the light of day

Do you think your resume is bad? Think again. I asked a group of Talent Acquisition Consultants the stinkiest resumes they have seen and they didn’t have a shortage of answers!

 

  •  I'm recruiting for an entry level role and see a candidate who is newly out of school. Looking good so far. That is until I have to scroll to PAGE SIX (lucky that I even scrolled that long) of her resume to see her work experience which is “Resume Writing”. She starts to describe her experience and then just stops….mid sentence. Words can’t explain!

 

  • One candidate described all the "machinery" she could use. Photocopier, fax machine, vacuum, toaster, spade!? She also stated she could drive a four (5) wheel drive car.

 

  • One resume was just the candidates name in size 72 font for the first 2 pages.

 

  •  I remember I saw a resume where the candidate put a picture of themselves  in what looked like their parents basement with their shirt off….the role was for an accounting position.

 

  • It’s always entertaining when you see made up names from applicants. I have had Charles Dickens and William Shakespeare!

 

  • Attack of the Clip Art. Nooooooo!

 

  • I saw a resume which was about 20 pages long and this document was just a manifesto of how crappy his last employer was and how he was going to sue them. I definitely didn’t call that guy.


  • People who think their resume has to be one page only and then cram in years of experience to make it fit use size 6 font. Stop it, stop it now!


  •  Any resume with script font or a picture….shudder.


  • I can’t believe how many people leave in the name of some other company they’d applied for in the mission statement on their resume. If you’re going to have a mission statement then don’t make it “To work for XYZ Company” and if you must do that then change it for every role you apply for. Grrr.


  •  I had someone walk in and drop off their resume with Reception, with no name or contact details on it.


  • When you see a resume where every single bullet point starts with “Experience in” and then every bullet point after starts the same but a different task.

1.       Experience in time management

2.       Experience in sending emails

3.       Experience in filing letters

4.       Experience in managing calendars

5.       Experience in writing terrible resumes


DELETE